Christmas Eve

THURSDAY, DECEMBER 24th

The Scenario: A Christmas Eve party where you WILL be guzzling champagne like nobody's business.

The Core Item: This Topshop party-ready slip dress, spliced with sex-bomb-lace and hey-girl-hey sequins.

O HOLY NIGHT! MY THIGHS ARE SHINING BRONZELY, FROM THE NEW SPRAY TAN I GOT TODAY!

So now that you enjoyed my abridged version of a Christmas classic, what are y'all doing tonight for Xmas Eve? I am running to a party so I'm making this short and sweet like my last Tinder date. For Christmas Eve, wear a little black dress with a lot of sex appeal. Pair it with a non-boring black pump (this one is festooned with stars!) and a kitschy clutch with a Christmas-appropriate slogan. These are all TOPSHOP because the brand has been absolutely killing it with their dresses this season (plus all items are under $100 so #winning!)

The Only Outfit You'll Ever Need

TUESDAY, DECEMBER 22nd

WHAT TO WEAR ANYWHERE

THE SCENARIO: For the days you feel you have nothing to wear and spend hours mulling over every item in your closet, you should wear this.

THE CORE ITEM: The perfect Sonia Rykiel sweater and Chanel slingback.

You know those times where you have absolutely nothing to wear, even though your overstuffed closet speaks an entire different story. Well, this outfit is eazy-peazy lemon squeezy. A stripe sweater (we all have one of those but this Sonia Rykiel one takes thaaaaa cakkeeee!) paired with high-rise vintage feel jeans and the MOST PERFECT SHOE IN HISTORY (check out 4 more ways to wear it here) is a great combination for an instantly stylish look.

You can wear this to work (so long as you work in a more casual environment); to Sunday afternoon brunch at Catch in the Meatpacking District; to plot revenge on your cheating husband like Amazing Amy in Gone Girl. I mean, the places and scenarios to wear this look really are endless.

The pop of red bag and the forties-style shades add a whiff of sophistication. Swap out the slingbacks for some sexy Loboutins for date night or after-work happy hour. 

BRIDGING THE GAP

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 18th

WHAT TO WEAR TO HOLIDAY PARTIES, PART 4

THE SCENARIO: Your third-wave feminist hipster friend who resides in Williamsburg but also makes fun of people who reside in Williamsburg is throwing a holiday party in her studio apartment (or was it micro-loft?) Her friends will be arriving in matching leather jackets and some type of Biggie or Metallica t-shirt (brownie points or a glass of wine for the chick that wears both at the same damn time!) so you want to wear an outfit with a preppy undertone that stands out in the crowd.

THE CORE ITEM: Gap's flannel shimmer roll-sleeve henley

As a wee young lad, it wasn't visions of sugar plum fairies that danced in my head. It was GAP sweaters, emblazoned proudly with the logo. They would stare at me from the window of the stare, taunting me with their beauty and seemingly calling my name. Every Christmas, a GAP-branded gift was bestowed upon me. A baby blue ringer tee with black GAP logo. A cherry-red sweater with a cream GAP logo. A grey hoodie with a patriotic American flag print GAP logo (this one, fyi, was my absolute favorite - the epitome of high fashion!)

And while the GAP logo still speaks loud and clear to me from varying t-shirts at my local store, I'm here to direct you toward more fashion-forward staples, and this outfit of head-to-toe GAP magic nails that.

The subtle hints of Lurex shimmer peaking through this traditional plaid make this a wardrobe staple for seasons to come (and it's only $54!) The denim skirt pairs pretty with plaids and looks cuter than a baby's ass with black suede Chelsea boots.

Because the weather outside is getting frightful, let's toss in a wool-trimmed parka (this one is GREAT) and some tights. Top it all off with the red beanie pictured and you're good to go, girl. PLUS, DID I MENTION EVERYTHING IS UNDER $100!

Methinks you should wear this to your cool Williamsburg friend's Christmas Eve party. So what if those hipsterz scoff at GAP - you were born and raised in New York City before those assface transplants even knew what Brooklyn was.