TUESDAY: DINNER WITH GIRLFRANDS

Who needs a man when you have a gaggle of girlfriends who understand your twisted sense of humor, your penchant for pints of Ben & Jerry's Half-Baked, and your bitchin' about the idiots you've met on Tinder (can we just admit to ourselves that love is dead and all collectively whisper RIP BOOBOO)?

It seems that when compared to your unbreakable friendships, a man just seems to be the accessory. The proverbial Celine bag. This isn't to trivialize the importance of falling head over Louboutins for someone you care about. By all means, enjoy that love boat. But, in a post-Sex and the City world, you have become more viscerally aware and celebratory of how your girls become your great loves. They are your army (f@%& the word 'squad' - can we pretty please lay this overused term to rest in the same metaphoric graveyard that love is eternally sleeping).  

So why not celebrate how much these chicas mean to you by skipping the same-old half-off cocktail at happy hour and head to a fancy-shmancy dinner that Blair Waldorf would be proud of. Reserve a table at Butter - the restaurant Gossip Girl chatted on about almost every episode XOXO - and wear this outfit pictured above. This Pixie Market knit dress (UNDER $100!) is perfect as we transition to chilly temps - pair it with cashmere Wolford tights and trendy Tibi flatforms (ON SALE FOR UNDER $300). A structured black bag adds a hint of luxury to this semi-casual outfit - this bag above is Balenciaga but Forever21's sleek tote will also do the trick and is only $32! Last but not least, since it's getting chilly, throw on a dusty rose BLK DNM leather jacket to add a fun pop of color to an otherwise neutral outfit. 

Dress by Pixie Market / Bag by Balenciaga / Shoes by Tibi

MONDAY: CYBER MONDAY AND CHILL?

 'Netflix and Chill?' - the rallying cry for horny millenials across the Tinderverse and 2015's popular Halloween costume for fuckboys across America - has become part of the cultural zeitgeist of tomfoolery that we love to hate. But for those of you who like to chill with pizza not penis (no judgment here - do you!!!), this outfit is the perfect look for actual Netflix and chill. But given that today is a national holiday of spending money on shit you don't need but really want, wear this right now while shopping the spectacular Cyber Monday sales. My favorite sales are the Net-a-Porter, Old Navy (everything is 50% off and the plaid shirts are a thing of beauty), the J. Crew (up to 40 percent off), and the Kate Spade sale (30% off everything!). Throw on your favorite pajamas and get shopping on these sales - only 6 hours left!

Sleepy Jones pajamas / Victoria's Secret slippers

FRIDAY NIGHT OUTFIT: HOW TO CHANNEL YOUR INNER CARRIE

You look like a cowgirl from a rodeo, but also like Carrie from that good ole' show. Your bag is bestudded, your boots are befrazzled, the denim dress is cray-cray but you can't help but be dazzled. So that's the point in all of this, Carrie meets the rodeo, now go give Big a kiss.

So here's the dealio. You made it through Thanksgiving. You only gained 1.2 pounds. And you survived Black Friday. You deserve a glass of champagne. No. Make that a bottle. Or two. Throw on this patchwork denim dress, white booties that might have had sexual relations with the Be Dazzler, and a star-studded handbag. Carrie Bradshaw would have worn this on one of her many Cosmopolitan-fueled fictional outings with the gurls. Samantha would have loved the boots, Charlotte would've liked the bag, and Miranda would've hated the outfit because... well, Miranda, hated everything (but then she totally redeemed herself in the second SATC movie so I'm going to let her off the hook on this one). Because it's getting cold out thurrr, pair it with an oh-so-trendylicious silver bomber jacket - this tubular tinfoil Gucci jacket induces horniness but this Monki jacket at ASOS will prevent a financial crisis.

When wearing a tricky outfit like this, confidence (or excessive drunkenness) is key. You have to commit to the outfit! And so what if you look like a frazzled tourist from Montana when you walk into the Standard Rooftop tonight and pretentious chicks in the same Forever21 body-con dress roll their eyes at you? Carrie is smiling from her television graveyard and that's all that matters. Period.

Dress by Junya Watanabe Comme des Garcons / Bag by Zara / Shoes by Jeffrey Campbell