The Lady or The Tramp

A classic camel coat is everything you'll ever need for your wardrobe. This timeless, double-breasted cashmere Burberry coat will give any look instant polish - from lingerie and vampy patent leather Tom Ford hooker boots (winky winky) to an office-ready pinstripe suit that screams CEO.

It's a choose your own adventure for the adult set with this coat: lady or tramp? For today, let's go with tramp because it's a feminist-tinted world (thank Sheezus!) and while the haters gon' hate, there's no shame to your game!

THE LOOK

Burberry Prorsum coat, $3,530  /  Valentino bag, $2,995  /  Tom Ford boot, $1,095 (was $2,190)

THE LOOK FOR LESS

ASOS coat, $73 (was $146)  /  Square Enough bag, $99 (was $198)  /  Nasty Gal boot, $158 

New Year's Is Tomorrow!

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 30th

Aritzia dress. Edie Parker clutch. Christian Louboutin pumps. MAC lipstick.

Ah, it's that time of year again where you vow to never touch another donut or Cosmopolitan ever again! New Year's is upon us and with it comes a batch of resolutions you subconsciously know you can't keep but will at least try to!

One of your resolutions is to be more fashionable and that is one you actually can keep because now you have ME in your life - I tell you what to wear and how to wear it. So you really have no excuse this time around.

To start tomorrow off on the right sartorial note and set the tone for a stylish 2016, I'm suggesting you go out with a BANG! BOOM! KAPOW! Wear a minimalist slip dress (this one is a luxe velvet style from Aritzia and comes in at under $100!) with a glossy patent leather pump (Christian Louboutin's black studded version is shoe #goals).

Since the outfit is neutral and understated so you're going to need a sharp red lip and jazzy clutch (I <3 Edie Parker's monochromatic stripe clutch!) to give the look some pop.

If you absolutely abhor this look, don't worry - I HAVE FIVE LAST-MINUTE OUTFIT IDEAS for the big night out that are easy-peezy lemon-squeezy to throw together.

THE B@$%! WEARS BALENCIAGA

DECEMBER 9th

If the Devil wears Prada then the bitch wears Balenciaga. Excuse my French but when you invent the most brilliant phrase of all time - OF ALL TIME! - you have to share it with the world dontcha? Well I did and you're very welcome. Actually, to pay me back, you can buy me this coat. It's a Balenciaga beauty - the 80's biker dude collar and splotches of artfully-applied pink spray-paint embroidery take this bouclé jacket from ladies who lunch to bitches who brunch.

In other words, the cocoon shape and tweedy look could have just another coat for Grandma Sadie's collection but in the hands of Alexander Wang (who tragically has dipset from the house of B), this coat is now for Grannie Baddie Winkle. In still more words, the coat is just freakin' cool!

And because you've been wearing that same puffer for the past three years (same here), it's time to invest in a coat that screams with style. You owe this Balenciaga coat to yourself for being so gosh darn beautiful. So what if you have to sacrifice six months of eating? Isn't it worth it in the end!

Anyways, when wearing coats that hit just above the knee like this Balenciaga, do yourself a favor and stick ONLY to sleek, tailored pants. They keep the silhouette looking trim and are office-appropriate for your 9 to 5 grind. Grab a glossy structured bag - M2Malletier are a thing of beauty - and a ankle-strap sandal with a little bit of edge (these Alexander Wang ones pictured are on sale so clickity-click quick!) And voila! You have an outfit that's quicher than quiche.