HAPPY NEW YEAR

JANUARY 1, 2016

Gucci dress. Gucci shoes. Edie Parker clutch. Ray-Ban sunglasses.

New year, new you! Or at least time to step it up and become the boss ass chick you were meant to be! And what better way to do that then wearing a dress that screams with confidence!

I'm head-over-Louboutins obsessed with Gucci's metallic technicolor designs this season. This dress paraded down the Resort 2016 collection and from the moment I saw it, my heart fell out of my butt. That Alessandro dude is giving me way 2 much life with what he's doing at Gucci.

The rainbow stripe top is everything (check out yesterday's post!) but this dress really is what dreams are made of. And while the dress may be a fantasy, the price tag is a nightmare ($2,600!) so I found a few options just as fun as the Gucci - preppy here, hipster there, and skanky over here.

Even if you usually stick to a monochromatic palette, when designers send not one, two, nor three colors down the runway but 7 at once in a cluster-fuck of ROYGBIV, it's time to resolve to wear the rainbow and not just taste it!

And wearing the rainbow isn't as tricky as you'd think: pair it with metallic shoes, loudly matching bags, and colorful aviators (I'd suggest pink or blue)! But most importantly, smile and have a ton of fun! Bad moods and the colors of the rainbow do not work well together! Happy new year, ladies!

New Year's Is Tomorrow!

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 30th

Aritzia dress. Edie Parker clutch. Christian Louboutin pumps. MAC lipstick.

Ah, it's that time of year again where you vow to never touch another donut or Cosmopolitan ever again! New Year's is upon us and with it comes a batch of resolutions you subconsciously know you can't keep but will at least try to!

One of your resolutions is to be more fashionable and that is one you actually can keep because now you have ME in your life - I tell you what to wear and how to wear it. So you really have no excuse this time around.

To start tomorrow off on the right sartorial note and set the tone for a stylish 2016, I'm suggesting you go out with a BANG! BOOM! KAPOW! Wear a minimalist slip dress (this one is a luxe velvet style from Aritzia and comes in at under $100!) with a glossy patent leather pump (Christian Louboutin's black studded version is shoe #goals).

Since the outfit is neutral and understated so you're going to need a sharp red lip and jazzy clutch (I <3 Edie Parker's monochromatic stripe clutch!) to give the look some pop.

If you absolutely abhor this look, don't worry - I HAVE FIVE LAST-MINUTE OUTFIT IDEAS for the big night out that are easy-peezy lemon-squeezy to throw together.

Feelin' Fendi

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MONDAY, DECEMBER 28th

Fendi sweater. Fendi bag. Fendi culottes. Fendi pumps.

Whoever created Monday is a sadistic asshole. He pretty much created a day with the sole purpose of making you remember how much your life sucks. And on these moody Mondays where gallons of iced coffee can't even revive you, you'll need a song to do the trick. A playful, anthemic song that makes you groove uncontrollably at your desk and reminds you life is a BEAUTIFUL thang (no, not thing - thang!)

My go-to jam is 'Feelin' Myself.' It's total girl power wrapped in a hard beat that makes you want to do this at work (make sure the boss isn't looking and twerk it out babe!)

So in honor of how much I feel myself and how much I feel Fendi this season, I put together a head-to-toe Fendi look. The fun sweater, the trendy culottes, the perfect magenta Baguette, and sky-high black pumps are the perfect outfit for work (assuming you're not in one of those stuffy corporate jobs), wine night at home with the girl gang, or Sunday brunch.

And to celebrate how much I'm feelin' it, I penned an abridged version of Nicki Minaj's rap verse on 'Feelin Myself.' Rap it out loud to your friends if you dare!

FEELIN' FENDI

I'm feelin' Fendi, I'm feelin' Fendi - I'm feelin' Fen! I'm feelin' Fendi, I'm feelin' Fendi - I'm feelin' Fen! 

I'm with some good girls lookin' back at it, and a good girl in my tax bracket, Got a black card let Saks have it, these Fendi bags is a bad habit. I wear Karl, Karl Lager, my Maybach, black matted. Girl never left and I'm back it, and feelin' Fendi like a crack addict. Floss so hard, back off, cause I'm feelin' myself, jack off. Thinkin' about clothes when I whack off, wax on, wax off. National anthem, culotte, fashion killer and I'm too hot. Lemme get a Fendi sweater with a black pump, 'On the Runway' with my fat rump.